whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Four minutes until I can fart!
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
