I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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