so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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