Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
