so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
