i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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