Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
