Midget sex pt 2 tonight
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
