uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
