i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
