A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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