sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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