i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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