Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
