why didn't you poke me back
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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