Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
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