We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
high people should be assigned attendants
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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