screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
