Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
