Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Randomize
