Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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