Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
