FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
