Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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