Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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