so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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