Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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