all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
