I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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