does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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