We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
