I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Randomize
