I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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