i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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