Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
