I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize