Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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