I wanna bring you to show and tell
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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