dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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