Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I won't apologize to a one balled man
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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