is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just want to make out with him forever
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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