Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
