Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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