Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
