I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
The best revenge is premature balding
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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