I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
