My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
