before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
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