I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
