do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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