yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
