you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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